--warning---this is a very long and somewhat rambling blog article in which I try to condense five years of my experience while writing Airport Musical--as you can see by the dates, I had a few false starts---
2/24/12 - raw
thoughts on the topic to TRY to get this agenda item (on the Joy of Songwriting
Blog) moving forward, even if incrementally.
I am in the midst of rewrites for Airport Musical.
It has been a slowly progressing process.
I seem to work on it in large chunks, when I have that much
time available.
I work on it more when there is a deadline, like the
Infringement Festival. That really helped motivate me.
I've done a good job of being brave to put out the raw work
in progress for others to give me feedback. That was really affirming... and
helped point me in the right direction.
It's about ... not being "ego attached" to it.
I am ENJOYING the way the layers of the story are revealing
themselves to me. The more I write, the more I discover in all the interconnections.
Somehow, a larger "point" is emerging. It's not ... blunt over the
head, or obvious.
That is all about writing the script.
I started with the songs. Well, really... the BASIS for the
songs were the characters... and the broad concept, which is in keeping with my
idea that writing a song is pretty easy when you have to underlying theme to
build on. Just pulling random words out of the air... hard to craft a lyric
from that. I may have already written a blog about that…. I’ll have to check back…
on finding the inspiration…. The three channels.. streams… that feed the song…
something I’ve thought about many times before….YES, it’s on the blog… august 2009… Where Do Songs Come From?
So... the LYRCIS for the songs came very easily. and the
music... pretty easily too.
And... for a first time doing such a thing, the script came
pretty easily too. It took HOURS AND HOURS AND HOURS... for all of that. But...
it's been fun. I like to think about it.
I don’t know if it’s “any good”… but from the feedback so
far, which has been all positive with some good constructive suggestions… I
think I can take that as an affirmative. So… I shall just continue to polish it
and it will evolve.
I thought the rewrites I had to do this February Break would
take longer and be more "painful" but it turned out ok. Fun,
actually. I had already written these little tidbits, scraps, to insert... to
solve the problem of the characters' names. All I had to do was go through and
weave them in. Then... clean it all up. Added more detail in certain places. I
expanded the opening scene a little bit. It seems good enough for this round.
Now I have to put my mind back on the MUSIC. Put that stuff
on the cutting room table. Write charts. I'm going to be spending more time w/
that Finale Program.
July 18, 2012
I want to … move along … this article… for the blog… so I can post
something new on there… and tie into the promotion for Airport Musical
1)
read what I wrote above
2)
decide what I want to say in light of organizing
the workshop
3)
the feeling of hearing the music performed by
real musicians!
January 9, 2014
Yikes... can we say time is flying!?
I started this article about writing a musical for my Joy of
Songwriting blog two years ago! I must
have been so busy writing the actual musical that I never finished the
blog. Oh well. Seems like a sensible priority in any case. I
must have backed off from writing this article because I’m concerned it will be
LONG. There is a lot to cover on the topic. But, here I am giving it another
shot! I hope it will be of interest to somebody, illuminating what goes into
writing a full-length musical.
BTW, before you read,
you may want to know: this is not intended to be a “how to write a musical”
article. You may learn something about how to write a musical from reading it,
but it’s more about how I wrote my musical. Call it a case study.
Here’s a quick outline for what I will cover in this blog:
-
inspiration
-
first efforts
-
next level
-
pushing into new territory as a writer
-
research process
-
sharing process
-
writing music, lyrics and book: an intertwined
process
-
rewriting process
-
continued motivation along the way
-
how I fit this project into my life
-
fun moments
-
hard moments
-
where it has taken me so far
-
where I would like it to go from this point
-
advice to myself for the next musical
Inspiration
I started writing Airport Musical six years ago! It was in
August of 2008. That’s when I went to Germany to perform at the Zappanale
Festival. I was stranded at JFK airport overnight because I missed my connection
due to “high winds.” Then, when I finally arrived in Berlin at 9 am I had to
wait another five hours until the drivers from the festival in Bad Doberan
could pick me up.
The inspiration to write Airport Musical literally did come
to me in a caffeinated haze at 3 am as I lay sprawled out on a granite bench in
the JFK International Terminal. It was, admittedly, a rather off-the-cuff idea.
It’s amazing that I followed through on it to this extent.
First Efforts
My first efforts came, believe it or not, a few moments
after that first giddy breath of inspiration. It dawned on me that every person
in the Airport had a story, was a character, and I began to notice more
details: what they were wearing, what they were doing, how they were reacting,
what they were saying, etc. My cast of characters was drawn from the people who
I actually hung out with. The extras, all the dance numbers, evolved from the
associated life-forms weaving in and out of my personal mini-drama that fateful
day.
The additional delay in Berlin was the turning point from
“random idea” and “fun mental game to pass the time” to actually committing something
to paper. I pulled out a tiny red notebook (I still have this!) and started
writing lyrics (and melodies/beats) for various characters. I wrote songs for each person I had hung out
with extensively: Felix, Anika, Frank (the real names!). There was also the
South African woman and the airline agent. I don’t remember their names. At this point the songs were simply fragments
that I quickly jotted down. Good thing I know how to notate music! The actual
melodies germinated there.
Next Level
I put the notebook away and forgot about it! Right. I had a
great time in Germany. When I came home... I don’t know how long it was before
I looked at the songs again. I recall that it was later in the winter, like in
January when I was on break from teaching. I could look back through my
journals and drafts to verify that, but it was not right away. In any case, I
decided, as a songwriting exercise, to complete the songs. I made rough demos
on my computer. At that point there was no story. The songs were simply
character portraits. I found it was fun to write from a different point of view
besides my own. I also wrote the love duet, and much later on various ensemble
pieces came through. It has been a fruitful challenge to write for more voices
and for diverse characters.
Sometime in the winter/spring 2009, my buddy Ron Ehmke put
out a notice about the Buffalo Infringement Festival to take place in July. I
decided it would be fun to share these songs with the public, so I signed up to
present “JFK The Musical.” It would be a
rock opera. Since I had ZERO dollars for a budget, I presented it as a
“workshop” and cast the play based on whoever showed up to be in it. I was SO
LUCKY that day because a lot of people came and we had exactly the right people
to do each “part.” Because of this event I had to craft a loose narrative,
though without any dialogue yet. I put the songs in a certain order that flowed...
kind of along the same trajectory as my day at the airport had gone. I played
the demos on the PA and had people just stand in place and react as they were
inspired to, pretending they were singing (a song they had never heard!).
Everyone had a blast! J Even my son, who was 8 at the time, joined
in playing the role of the soldiers...and the idea for having kids in that part
germinated.
A few days before the first workshop I realized I didn’t
have a scene in the airport bar. I had not hung out in the bar at all during my
overnight stay at JFK, but it seemed like the musical needed a “bar scene.” So
I wrote “Raise a Glass for All Tomorrows” ... very quickly... and had it ready
just in time. Ironically it was the favorite song of all assembled!
I have to give myself kudos for having “cojones” because I
took the risk to share my rough demos which I had created all by myself on
Garage Band... with modulated voice for the guy parts, etc. Little by little
... since then... I have improved upon the demos, but they are still just
demos. It’s a lot easier for me to perform in the studio than live... because
my piano playing (at the time) was stunted. And people liked it! So that’s what
truly mattered. I even got a write up in the Buffalo News, a featured artist in
the festival.
Pushing Into New
Territory As A Writer
The main “takeaway” I received from the first workshop was
the encouragement to write dialogue. People wanted to know more about the
characters. They wanted a story. I had never written a play before, so I had to
push myself into totally new territory. What I found was quite pleasing. One
quick observation: my background of writing lyrics (and grant applications!)
really came in handy for writing dialogue. Keeping it concise is important, and
I found so many fun opportunities for word-play. I only hope other people will
recognize that in my dialogue. I don’t know if it’s apparent. At this point I
don’t even know if it will be considered “any good”... ha ha... but it’s at least as good as half
the crap out there! J
.... And that last sentence is an example of how I keep myself afloat in this
very intimidating process!
So I think this puts me up to 2010. For Infringement 2010 I
decided to do another “workshop” but this would be more of a working workshop.
I had a few scenes of dialogue written out, notably, the scene with Kay and
Isra. I had some ideas for creative-dramatic exercises to get people involved.
It was a totally hands-on event. Two days. Haha... I recall a group of young
women were the first to arrive. I was still setting up. They decided to leave;
I think they were expecting an actual performance and didn’t want to dance and
act and be part of it!
That day I was taking a HUGE risk because I had NO IDEA what
I was going to wind up doing. I mean, I had SOME idea... but I didn’t know who
would come and how they would participate. ... nor... what we would create. But
I did it anyway. Ah, the joy of songwriting!! Like falling off a cliff
sometimes, hoping you will be able to fly.... and I did.
It was awesome. I got a chance to play with some ideas ...
to see the characters walking and talking... and dancing... and emoting. We played
loosely with the overall situation and got many ideas for what I could do with
the script.
More writing had to wait until 2011. I could only work on
the play in chunks of time during breaks in my school music teaching job. So,
for example, September through December school took all my attention. Then in
January I would find some more time. By the time I got to the summer I had a
lot of time and worked consistently. And also as a full-time mother, I can’t
devote full 18-hour days to it as I undoubtedly would otherwise. This is why
it’s taken so many years.
In 2011 for Infringement I did a “staged reading” of the script,
with actors singing along with “Karaoke” versions of the songs, reading the
script and walking through the action (very little rehearsal). It showed me
what worked and what needed work! In
2012 I put together a band and we performed the music live and read the revised
script, but we couldn’t walk it out since we were in a very tight space at El
Museo Gallery. Then in 2013, since I couldn’t get into a real theater space, I
didn’t do any workshop. I only worked on rewrites, shaping the story along the
lines of my advice from Jim Santella. In December 2013 I FINALLY submitted the
play to MusicalFare Theatre in Buffalo. As of today, January 9, 2014, I await a
return email. I knew they wouldn’t get back to me right away since their
website said they were out on vacation until January 7. Now we’ve had a
blizzard. It could take them a while to get to the bottom of their email pile.
But that’s where it stands right NOW
So let me jump back a bit into the process.
Research Process
After the second workshop I had a better idea of where I was
going to go with the script but I didn’t want to entirely recreate the wheel of
musical theater. So I got online and I went to the library. I got serious with
some homework. I found many very good resources about Musical Theater in
history, style, writing and producing. A bibliography would be another good
project some rainy day.
History & Style – I wanted my play to fit into
the spectrum of the pre-existing genre. It makes references in some ways to
existing works in echoing, mirroring or even drastically departing from what
has come before. That’s just how writing works. It’s not in a vacuum. It was
also very fun watching old musicals, even going back to Vaudeville and George
M. Cohan. I watched many musicals, some I had seen, some I had not. That would
be a topic for another blog article... and also an ongoing project that could
consume vast hours! But, in relation to Airport Musical, people were saying it
reminded them of “Chorus Line” and “Grand Hotel”. Musically, I was always
inspired by “Jesus Christ Superstar” and “Fiddler on the Roof.” Buffalo has a
great theater scene, so I’ve gone to all the local productions I could see:
“Rent” at MusicalFare, “Hedwig” at New Phoenix, “Wizard of Oz” at Ujima, “Aida”
at BAVPA, and a few more things...and I’m going to see “Wicked” this weekend at
Sheas. Theatrical magic is so delightful. I think the setting of the airport
will be a lot of fun for a director, choreographer, set designer and costumer
to play with. That idea excites me.
Writing – The most memorable quote I found was from a
website about writing and producing musicals. The first sentence was ... I’m
paraphrasing ... “So, you want to write a musical? ... DON’T!” ... Then they
made a very convincing argument about why it is impossible to get a new musical
to the stage and forget about it becoming a big money-making hit. Then, of
course, the author proceeded to explain the steps you would have to go through
to do that if you were not afraid to try after his warning.
That, for me, was a fun motivator. It’s impossible. Ha ha.
Well, I was doing it anyway. I think what has kept me at it was that I’m not
focusing on the “end” result so much as the process along the way. IF I get
this play produced, and IF it becomes popular, and IF it goes farther up the
industry scale, and IF we find producers and funders and promoters and polish
this show to be a fabulous production... and IF it gets to that level and makes
money... and gets on Broadway and gets a touring production... you know what?...
at that point I’m just the writer. I won’t have to go on tour with them! I’ll
have time to work on other stuff.
Through writing the play I’ve confronted a lot of the inner
turmoil in myself... so... its success would be super healing, indeed. But if
it doesn’t go that far, I have learned from it anyway. I succeed either way.
That is the sweet spot for sustaining the action.
But back to research... I
knew there was a reason I had put off writing this blog... I knew it would be
long. But I’m sitting here on a “snow day” and I have the time. Will anyone
want to read it? Let me know if you are!
I also researched --- believe it or not – the practical
issues of how a musical theater play should be formatted. I found out there is
a standard font, font size, margins, punctuation, capitalization, italization,
etc. for the stage directions, indentations for the character names, etc. So I
went through and formatted my play in that style. It actually helps make it
more readable. I found that there is software you can buy to assist in this...
which perhaps I would buy if this play works out and I want to write another
one!
Another aspect of the research included looking at what
plays big are currently up now, what theaters are around in Buffalo, in NYC and
elsewhere. Who are the people in the business now... big and small! How much
does it cost to produce a musical, etc. How can I go about raising the money
myself... to get it started. I found I can set up a not-for-profit fund at
Fractured Atlas, but I decided to wait until I had ironed out the plot a little
bit more. I went to several local theaters to watch their productions and start
thinking of who would be best to approach when I was ready.
These kinds of functional details are often overwhelming and
discouraging, but I also know that when I get to that point I will not be
operating on my own. So after digging up a good amount of information I
returned my focus to the story and the music. But it’s good to prepare for what
lies ahead. Practical choices in the writing will make a difference later on
when it comes time to stage the play. I should revisit this article AFTER I get
a full-scale production on stage!
Sharing Process
I shared the play out in several ways, got feedback, and
folded that feedback into rewrites. This was a crucial step, I’d say... perhaps
one of the wisest strategies I took. Again, since I’m used to writing songs,
pulling together an entire book was new for me. I could have chosen to find a
play writer, but I didn’t. This is because... it was MY experience. The songs
came out of that. Who is best to write the story than me? But I knew I needed
help and I’m glad I got it!
The Infringement workshops were the first line of sharing.
Then each year, as the workshop presentations grew more developed, the people
who were involved in being IN the workshops with more rehearsal helped give me
a lot of information about walkability and talkability... and singability and
danceability! It was there! I changed what seemed to fall flat. Added parts that
were clearly missing. I even got “audience feedback” on sticky notes so I have
“blurbs” for the website. I MADE a website (airportmusical.com... which is
currently just hooked back to my kilissa.com main page) and I made a Facebook
page for it.
Last fall (2012) I invited Jim Santella to help me with the script. He took me
under his wing and became a de facto editor. He talked with me for hours at a
time on the phone, and at his house, combing through possibilities and details
of the story. In January 2013 I convened a panel of readers, including Jim and
his wife Mary, Michael Delaney, and Michael Arden Sulzbach. We read through it
and they showed me where things were too long or where the emotion wasn’t
coming through as I had hoped it would.
Everyone likes the songs, all along. I have never had anyone
say anything disparaging about the songs... no need to change them. Jim made
some good suggestions about where I could add songs... use the song form to do
the work of the story telling. He even suggested some of my older songs I could
adapt for the play. I solved some dialogue problems by instead making a song in
that spot. It picks up the flow!
I was fortunate to be able to get Jim’s help. He knew me
already from way back, before I was in college! I was deeply honored that he
respected my previous work with the Jazzabels—and he recalled it with such
detail! For people who don’t know, Jim Santella is a local legend in Buffalo.
He was the blues DJ for years on public radio, before that a rock jock on the big
rock station, and currently in his retirement he does the “theater talk”
program on public radio. He knows everybody. He told me who I should go to and
how to go to them. He also has a great background in writing and enjoyed
helping me shape my plot and he asked the right questions to help me fill out
the characters’ back-stories.
So, in a nutshell about sharing, that was a big step for me
in making what had started as a silly impulse into a work of actual substance
that people have responded to with overwhelming enthusiasm. Why I keep going,
yep.
I told you this would
be long. I you are still reading, thanks.
Writing music, lyrics
and book: an intertwined process
Most writers, my informal research showed, don’t write all
three parts of a musical. Very few writers, in fact, tackle the whole project.
But in the case of Airport Musical, it was the only way I could proceed...due to
the nature of the story, the nature of my writing style, and the way I was able
to fit it into my schedule mostly late at night when my son was asleep, or
during the day when I was off from work for the summer. But I like working on
my own. Transitioning to a phase where I have to work with other people to
mount a full-scale production will challenge my current insularity!
I wrote the music and lyrics first. I had the characters and
the setting before I even had anything more than a rough “plot”: a bunch of
random people are stuck overnight in an airport. They amuse themselves and
perhaps discover something about themselves through the experience. I couldn’t
just randomly make people up because I already had the main figures. Although, I
DID change the names and facts to protect the innocent, so to speak. And I
ended up making up some people, drawn roughly from various people I had
observed. The main characters have evolved quite a bit. I ended up giving them
back-story and even the supporting characters gained a small bit of
personality. At first they were just “random travelers” but now they have names
and descriptions, some consistency. That came actually from the need to solve
staging issues. I wanted a sense of more random people. But with the trio of
“extra’s”... plus the priest... so that’s four... and the evil duo (tsa agents,
etc) I was able to whittle that down to 5 actors. The kids are sort of extras
too... not a lot of lines, but big on the action. The number of kids could
change. There are six main characters – the male/female leads, supporting
male/female and two additional female. Then there would be more dancers, ideally.
It’s big. I created Betty Boots because I needed a mother for the kids. This
allowed me to make space for a country line dance, so I composed “Big Boots,”
preceded by the patriotic hymn, “For Country and For God.” How entertaining!
This opened a plot turning point where Kay’s feelings about her USO tour evolved
(it didn’t start out as a USO tour, but Jim wanted me to specify what her gig
would be). The example Kay sees in Betty’s life as a faithful army wife makes
her think again about the people she is going to perform for, and perhaps
finding a way to make a difference rather than turn away from the opportunity
(she gets that from Frank). And in turn the scene gave a space for the
male/female leads (Kay and John) to amp up their connection by dancing
together... awkwardly. It’s like the story started feeding itself.
I have to edit this
later... I’m rambling. Trying to write while I eat dinner!
The part that I enjoyed the most was that as I was digging
into the story and the lyrics these kinds of interconnections would appear;
similarities would just pop out. I enjoyed finding ways to weave small
references throughout...like the blue and red scarves, the dusty curios... the
birds... etc. I don’t know if people will notice that until they become very
familiar with it. It’s subtle. But I feel it holds the fabric together.
When I first did the songs I just thought about the
conversations I had in the airport and pulled out some key words, a mood, an
attitude. And I just wrote. I mean... that’s a different blog post. I don’t
know if I’ve written that already.... where I find my inspiration... how I
structure songs. I just... DO it... at this point. I listen and then I just
know. I also have lots of strategies to stir my creative pot. I love the
thesaurus.
I go back and forth between music and lyrics, too. I usually
find a snippet of both and then begin to knit from there!
So... adding the dialogue was for me an interesting
extension. But I was kind of working backwards, I think. I had to write
dialogue that would lead into an existing song. Some of the songs I ended up
changing a little bit in response to the context... but most are still as they
were when I jotted them down in Berlin.
So... If the song was going to mention something... I would
want to lead into it. ... but not state the material again, outright. The song,
as I found, should not recap the preceding dialogue. It should extend it. The
dialogue sets up the song. The characters can only talk until they can talk no
more and must sing to express the next level of feeling. But, essentially, the
songs are what dictated what the dialogue would need to say. The dialogue
smoothes the transition, too. The song doesn’t just come out of the blue.
If anything, I probably got too wordy with it. It still
needs to be pared down. It’s too long (much
like this blog!). But I feel like I need to work more with walking talking
actors to do that. I’m sure it will be clear then. Perhaps it’s inexperience,
but the physical aspect also guides my thinking. I’ve been doing plays at
school with the children and I can easily see solutions to staging problems when
I’m working with real actors. Where they stand, how they are arranged, the colors,
the sequence, the blocking; all that stuff helps me figure out the words too.
I tried to put in only the most basic stage directions. I
think different theaters would have different requirements, open different
possibilities.
Some of the dialogue is stationary, and some is expected to
be moving. The songs, also, some are
more action packed than others. All of it, I hope, will be easy to bring to life
with good actors.
I purposefully wrote some solo pieces, some duets, some
trios, and larger ensemble pieces...to provide variety and changes of pace to
keep the audience engaged. My piece de resistance, though, I think, is using
Mozart’s “Eine Kleine Nacht Musik” behind the scene with Kay and Isra. The
dialogue I wrote was actually the first scene that I wrote out for the 2010
Infringement Workshop, and it was taken almost word for word with the
conversation I had with a real airline agent at JFK. Uncannily, it fits in
PERFECTLY to the beats of Mozart’s piece. I didn’t have to change a word! That
was a really wonderful moment of serendipity. The actors may have a hard time
staying on beat, but if they have some small bit of opera background they can
feel the cadence of it.
So... the process of discovery like that has been
exhilarating.
Ok... I’m halfway
through this article. Thanks for hanging in there with me!
Rewriting Process
There were times when I tore whole scenes apart and ripped
them up... some stuff got tossed out, other stuff wound up coming back in other
places.
When I first wrote it I gave the characters (fake) names,
for convenience. Their names were not used in the dialogue. One day I decided
to see if I could TRY to make the names part of the play. I went through and
wrote in snippets of dialogue where the characters either introduced themselves
or mentioned their name or another character’s name. Then I went in and stitched
them into the scenes. I use this sewing analogy several times because that’s
really how it feels. My mother sews a lot too... taught me as a kid.
The opening scene was redone several times. Originally it
was just John Smith on his cell phone. In 2011 I added the big chorus number of
“All Around the World” as a more exciting opener. In 2012, following Jim’s advice, I added the
“prologue” which started out as a scene of Kay packing for her journey, but later
I decided to make it a whole cast number with mini-portraits of all the
characters, led by the pilot. It makes sense to have the pilot open it up and I
was going to do that anyway... as like a pre-show skit. So... now it’s just IN
the show. It’s more seamless. To write the pilot’s song I did a lot of
listening to airline pilots on YouTube. First I just wrote out a basic credible
statement, using very boring pilot lingo. Then I thought... this DRAGS... why
not make it into rhymes... a rap. Now it works on more than one level.
Continued Motivation
Along The Way
Despite the prohibitive costs of mounting a full-scale
musical... and the massive amounts of time it takes to put all this together...
somehow I have stayed on track step by step. The greatest overall motivation
was that I decided to take it slowly. I had to fit this project into my life (see more comments about that below!) so
I could only do a little bit at a time. I was also pushing along a few other
strategic agenda items concurrently...my deeper musical development and my
school curriculum. I decided to put Airport Musical writing to the front,
before CD writing so I had to put that part of the dream on the back burner.
But keeping it all in balance has kept me from getting discouraged.
So, taking it easy... giving myself leeway to do that... is
I would say my Number 1 motivator.
Number 2 was that I set myself deadlines. Committing
to the Infringement Festival and pulling other people into it forced me to push
ahead a lot harder. Getting a band to play the music motivated me to write
charts! Applying for the Jonathan Larson grant inspired me to write a concise
synopsis. I’ve written an even more concise one recently when I sent it to
Randy Kramer at Buffalo’s MusicalFare theater.
Number 3 was the positive feedback I got at each step
of the way! I have a lot of people rooting for me. They will love to see it be
successful. I have to allow that energy to flow in and float the project
further, despite nagging doubts about competition, breaking in to the industry,
money, etc.
Number 4 (and this could equally be number 1) I
simply enjoy writing. I enjoy writing the music, and I also have found I enjoy
writing the play. I have even enjoyed it
when the going has been rough. There were aspects of the plot and dialogue that
were truly stumping me. It was so hard to have to throw a lot of stuff away. I
did, actually, cut quite a bit of my first round of dialogue. It’s hard to
know. But fortunately for Microsoft word ... I can just save the old version
and cut up a copy.
Number 5 - I got to a certain point with it... say...
last summer... or the summer before... that I realized how many hours I had
dedicated to it... and I realized that I couldn’t justify quitting! If I did it
would have been a huge waste of time. I mean... sure... I’ve “learned” from the
process... but I want to see it UP THERE – on the stage. Gotta keep my eye on
the prize after all this time invested.
How I Fit This
Project Into My Life
Full disclosure.. I have been a “single parent” since 2000,
for all intents and purposes. I was also teaching full time music in the
Buffalo Public School District. Going to the Zappanale Festival in 2008 when my
son was 7 years old (his birthday falls in October) was a major victory for me.
I sent him to Texas to spend time with my sister (thank you, Kerry! She even
paid his airfare!). It was the first time I had really had to myself for 7
years. I felt SO FREE to just be me... to be in that airport... on my way to
Germany. I had met the people I was going with and made the connection all via
the internet... and my own savvy networking. The rest of my Buffalo-based Zappa
Tribute Band didn’t want to go... so I went along with some friends I had met
from Connecticut who also play Zappa and Beefheart. The festival had invited
our whole band, but I was the only one from Buffalo to take them up on it. I
also had gotten myself a grant from the NY Foundation for the Arts to help with
the travel expenses! So... I had this
practically free trip to Europe with new friends. It was a BIG adventure. I had
my saxophone with me and a small wheely suitcase and a backpack.
So... I’m going back this far... because.... that was the
impetus. When I got to the airport in Buffalo at like 10 am for a noon
flight... I was just simply happy to be there at all. As one flight delay after
the next started to happen... I wasn’t overly distressed... because... I was
FREE! I overheard Anika’s story in
Buffalo... it was hilarious. I was just overhearing! Then, funny enough, I kept
running into her later, too. I met Felix on the plane in Buffalo... and it
turns out we were both going to Germany, so we decided to hang out together
rather than get a pricey hotel. He was adorable.... but way younger than me. I
had ... my heart was in the process of being devastated by ... he who I will
not name... but the possibility for that love was still in play at that point.
So... anyway... the trip was truly an epic adventure for me.
And ... my imagination took me to even stranger places as I roamed the terminal
all-night with Felix.
I have a low-budget studio set up in my back room of my
house. I spent countless hours crafting the demos. I would do it after I put my
son to bed, or on the weekend while he was playing with a friend, or in the
summer. I would get LOST in making the demos. I LOVE recording. I love
composing. If I work on that for 12 hours I’m just getting started!
I would work on it while I was cooking dinner, too. I’d put
the water onto boil... go in and write some lyrics... come out put the
sphaghetti in... write some more lyrics... record a draft of a tune or a bass
line... stir the sauce, etc.
It has also brought wonderful people INTO my life... I’ve
made new friends by reaching out and pulling off the rough productions via the
Infringement Festival. Leslie Fineberg, Liz Spiro-Carmen, Runa and Ernie Pigden,
Michael Delaney, Michael Arden, Paul Zanolli, Alex Mead, Dement Ormand, Marlowe
Wright, Beth, Carrie, Jim Caughill, John Shotwell, Melissa Campbell, Steve the
Gateway Gallery dude. I’m certainly leaving people out... but they know who
they are.
Anyway, with this much time and effort already invested, I
see no reason to stop until it goes all the way. It’s part of my life... and I
put my own life into the story... with many things changed, but it’s all me, in
one way or another.
I’m ready to be DONE with it.... like... gestating...
nurturing for only so long. I’m ready to see it leave the nest and get a life
of it’s own. Hopefully soon.
Fun Moments
·
Making the demos, countless hours recording and
creating.
·
Dancing to the demos as I thought “out loud” in
movement, imagining the action that could happen on stage
·
Bringing people together to practice in my back
yard... working out rough choreography for “All Around The World” ... and my
neighbors hearing it, and liking it
·
The “ah ha” moment of realizing that the
soldiers could be the kids ... solving the dramatic logistics by making it all
imaginary.
·
Listening back to some of the songs I have
created ... especially after some time has passed... and thinking... wow, I did
THAT!
·
Feeling excited anticipation and confidence that
I can actually usher this play to the real stage.
Hard Moments
·
Time, so much time, it takes so much time to do
this! Finding time, making time, elapsing time, where has the time gone?
·
Any moment where I feel excruciating self-doubt;
the ugly worry that it won’t be appreciated by the theater community; concern
about breaking in to the clique, and some small experiences of that wall of
resistance. (note to self, must visualize breaking through the bubble wall)
·
Last summer I had to face major re-writes, after
consulting with Jim Santella. I had to literally deconstruct some scenes and
start over. I had to look deeper within to find the heart of the story behind
the story... and reveal stuff about myself... I felt quite vulnerable saying
some of it. Finding a way to package that information that would be
interesting, entertaining, and also ... would make sense... to further the
plot, etc. I was shying away from some of the heavier elements... but I think I
have found the balance.
·
Letting go of some of the edgier elements... in
order to just... shore up the boundaries. I think if there is any weakness...
it will be that it is not edgy enough... so some of that may be reintroduced in
future incarnations. I’m talking about harder cutting commentary about the
socio-political elements: the TSA, global warming, our culture of alienated
consumption. But I decided the musical would be more “successful” if it was a
bit lighter. I want teenage girls to like it; people of all ages really. I hope
to sneak more edge into it as the production evolves.
Where It Has Taken Me
So Far
The biggest leap has been the growth I’ve experienced in
writing an extended work. This process has caused me to dig much deeper than
any previous song-writing endeavor. I just keep digging in this one spot and I
keep finding so much more. It’s really a mother-lode for all kinds of learning.
Where I Would Like It
To Go From This Point
I am looking forward to the connections the musical will
bring me in the near and far future. I’m excited about the prospect of
collaborating with other artists to bring it to the stage. Right now, as I
write this reflection, I’m on the cusp of that.
The other day my good friend, Michael Delaney, who awesomely
played “Frank” in several versions of the workshops, said to me... asked me...
am I raising money yet. He wants to make a contribution! This was an
unsolicited comment. How lucky I am to have such supportive friends and a
community that is fertile for growing this kind of production.
Advice To Myself For
The Next Musical
I already have an idea for a “next” musical, for real. It’s
not formed yet hardly at all, but it was an idea that came to me and it’s
simmering there. That will be to do a musical about Nicola Tesla. I of course
am waiting until Airport Musical is out of diapers before I start another one!
1)
Start with the story first! Writing a story from
existing songs was not easy. Once I got rolling on Airport Musical I did end up
writing some songs that were needed to fill in parts, and those songs came
pretty easily... well... not all of them, but some just rolled right out.
2)
Start with research before writing the story. I
suppose the “research” I did for Airport Musical was merely my own experience
of staying overnight in the airport. I became an EXPERT at that by going
through it. Just once was enough. I want my ghostly ballet to capture the
essence of that. Another reason why I
have to work very closely with the director and choreographer so that they
don’t just insert any old experience. I want it to reflect MY experience...
which was a magical one.
3)
Line up partners early on; get serious about
producing it so that it doesn’t take ... like ... 10 years to get it up and
running. Get funding so I can have support while I’m writing it.
4)
Get that software to help keep things formatted
and give more flexibility in editing.
5)
Fix up the studio to make it even more
versatile. Which means... have more money to have better gear. And get
musicians in there to help record demos.
6)
That’s my dream.
7)
And... I just had an idea about Nicola Tesla meeting
the Maid of the Mist.. the Native American legend. I need to go (in the summer)
to sit by his statue and meditate there, let him tell me the story.
And THAT is a really
supremely long blog article. It’s been five years of writing, after all! I just
needed to get this all down, before I forget. Out of my system. So, there it
is, for all of posterity. If anybody reads this... thank you. Please comment. Your feedback is appreciated.
Posts
